


Quadratic Equations

by its_blankcos



Category: Heathers (1988), Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempt at Humor, Everyone Has Issues, Everyone Needs A Hug, F/F, Fluff, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort??? maybe???, I Don't Even Know, Light Angst, Like Really Badly, My First Fanfic, Not Beta Read, One Shot, TW: Swearing, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Why Did I Write This?, as if heathers gonna ask for one tho, but they don't know that yet lol, characters are also kinda OOC ngl, don't hit me lmao, enjoy this mess, gayyyyy, heather also can't sleep, heather's still a bitch?? but nicer than canon, i haven't talked to an actual human in two weeks soooo..., i'm tired ok, ok i'm done rambling, probably has a lot of grammar mistakes, so don't come for me too hard, so they help each other sleep but not really, tw: allusions to insomnia, tw: minor slut shaming, tw: vague implication of sexual harassment, veronica can't sleep, very awkward if i'm gonna be honest, well as much fluff as i can fit, what did you expect it's the heathers, while they still sorta don't like each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:15:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26908726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/its_blankcos/pseuds/its_blankcos
Summary: The Heathers were not good people, Veronica suddenly decided on a sleepless Sunday morning (Night? Who cares anymore. Her sleep schedule certainly didn’t).It was a shame, really. Part of her hoped they actually had souls, a rare optimistic thought she liked entertaining once in a while. She never understood why it was so hard for anyone to at least try harder to be a better person (Not like she was the paragon of moral decisions either. A pink sweater-wearing friend instantly came to mind).ORVeronica can't sleep. Heather also can't sleep.So what's a girl gotta do? Call her resident blue-clad forger turned not-quite-friends-but-getting-there for answers to maths work she actually doesn't care about. A night of unrest soon turns into late night banter and slightly awkward conversations.Maybe Heather isn't quite the mythic bitch she makes herself out to be. Veronica will figure that out later.
Relationships: Heather Chandler & Veronica Sawyer, Heather Chandler/Veronica Sawyer
Comments: 5
Kudos: 85





	Quadratic Equations

**Author's Note:**

> Look at the tags for some TWs! I don't know if they're necessary, but I want everyone to be safe. 
> 
> With that said, enjoy this actual hot mess.

The Heathers were not good people, Veronica suddenly decided on a sleepless Sunday morning (Night? Who cares anymore. Her sleep schedule certainly didn’t). 

It was a shame, really. Part of her hoped they actually had souls, a rare optimistic thought she liked entertaining once in a while. She never understood why it was so hard for anyone to at least try harder to be a better person (Not like she was the paragon of moral decisions either. A pink sweater-wearing friend instantly came to mind).

Veronica internally scoffed at her wistful thinking. As if Heather actually tried hard at anything, especially at something as unimportant to her as being nice. She’s pretty sure the mythic bitch would rather drink drain cleaner. That was a situation that would certainly leave many people happy (Especially Duke, though the complexities of their sort-of-friendship almost always left Veronica with a headache. Sometimes she thinks it’s because they’d rather put up with each other than be truly alone. It's a thought that never gets too far).

Veronica never understood why they kept her in their group, another grievance that would not leave her alone. She still doesn’t. Her forging skills were certainly useful every now and then, but it’s not like they needed to invite her into their inner circle to get that out of her (She guessed part of her hoped they secretly cared about her in some twisted way. It was a nice thought, but one that most likely wasn’t too healthy).

Their job was looking pretty and being popular. She liked being protected, that was certain, but not at the expense of her actual friends.

Martha.

It was no surprise Martha was the definition of the opposite of the Heathers. Smart, nerdy, unpopular and kind.

_Sometimes I wish I was still a nobody. At least I would still be somebody to my real friends. Like Martha._

Veronica groaned as she rolled over, her face squishing into the soft cotton of the pillow. It was a hard choice to make. The emotional side of her screamed at her to just go back to Martha, but the logical part knew she couldn’t. Being with the Heathers was the ultimate protection from everything else, and as cruel as it sounded, she wasn’t willing to give that up.

_Sorry Martha._

Still, that didn’t mean everything was going fantastic. Everyday since she became a Heather, people expected something from her. Sweaty boys at parties didn’t understand the meaning of ‘no’ if it whacked them in the head with a croquet mallet and the ‘loser’ kids as dubbed by the rest of the student body scurried away the second she entered any classroom, like a school of fish from a hungry shark.

She just doesn’t want to deal with this kind of power anymore. It was nice the first week or so, but now, it was starting to get real old.

The darker thoughts attempting to bubble up from her head halted as her phone began to vibrate from beside her. The screen lit up, bathing the dark room in sudden artificial light.

_What the fuck? Who calls at three in the morning?_

Groaning, she struggled up and snatched her phone laying on the bedside table. The name ‘DEMON BITCH’ popped up on the screen. Veronica’s eyes strained forward to read it.

_Ah. Of course._

Veronica stifled a heavy sigh as she answered the call. Heather’s voice fluttered through, the speakers crackling as the girl on the other end adjusted her posture.

“Ugh, fucking finally. I was beginning to think you’d drowned in all your terrible life choices.” 

“Ha ha. Love you too Heather. What do you want?”

“My, Ronnie. Can’t I call my best friend without her accusing me of wanting something? You wound me so!”

Heather was most definitely pouting from behind the phone. Veronica rolled her eyes. What a drama queen (Her heart fluttered at the use of her nickname, but she quickly pushed it down).

“Cut the crap Heather. It’s three in the morning and I don’t have time for your bullshit.” Veronica’s voice came out with a strained bite to it, surprising even herself with its aggressive tone.

“Hell Ronnie, who pissed in your drink? Not in a mood for a chat with your best friend?”

Veronica glared at the phone as if it had personally offended her. She really wasn’t in the mood for Heather’s snark, especially when she was _trying_ to go back to sleep (She wasn’t, but that's not the main issue here). She could vividly see Heather smirking and it was grating on her already sleep-deprived, frayed nerves.

Nevertheless, her voice came out in a more resigned but bitter tone as she answered, “Not your best friend. Just, tell me what Her Majesty of Westerberg High wants so I can go back to sleep.”

“As much as I don’t appreciate your attitude right now, I’ll shut up. Anyway, I do need something done.”

Veronica’s mouth turned up at the confirmation. She shuffled around before speaking, her back finally relaxing onto her pillows.

“Of course, my queen. Your most loyal servant is at your service! What request shall I have the pleasure of fulfilling today?”

Veronica stifled her laughter into the palm of her hand. Her terrible British impression was bound to irritate Heather. Bad move, but totally worth it. If Heather was going to annoy her, Veronica was not passing up any opportunity to do the same (She wondered why she even felt comfortable enough to tease her in the first place. Probably her no-filter brain so early in the morning. Night? Still don’t care).

“...Can you knock that off? You’re acting like a child.”

“My. What has upset you so, my queen? I shall attend to it immediately.”

Heather huffed into the phone, clearly upset. The corners of Veronica’s mouth widened into a full on grin. Success.

“...You, know what? I’ll just ignore you and get to the point. I need to copy your maths work, so send the answers over text. Forgot to do it and all.”

Veronica’s grin dropped from her mouth into a frown, the bridge of her nose scrunching up in sudden annoyance. This girl would be the death of her, in more ways than one. She responded after an awkward beat, dropping the accent as the bite returned to her voice.

“Okay… Okay. With all due respect, are you serious?”

“What?” Heather had the audacity to sound offended and Veronica could feel the last of her nerves finally snap.

“You call me at three in the morning just to ask for maths homework? Jesus Heather, can’t you just ask Duke for a copy at school next week or god forbid, do it yourself? I’m not your personal answer sheet to everything!”

“I’m guessing someone pissed in your drink and also took a huge dump in your bathtub?”

“Wh- I need to sleep as well Heather!”

She heard Heather suddenly scoff into the phone.

“Please, Ronnie. The four boxes of instant coffee you have stuffed in the back of your cupboard says otherwise. As if you were trying to fucking sleep. The fact that you picked up the phone at all further proves my point. Anyway, It’s just maths work.”

“Yeah, very funny. You didn’t need to call so early to get it. Besides, why didn’t you even do it?” Veronica grumbled into the phone as Heather answered her question. She noticed the girl’s clipped tone as she responded.

“You really don’t know anything do you, Veronica? I have more important things to do than a two page worksheet on quadratic equations or whatever.” The sudden absence of her nickname was not lost on Veronica. Still, she pressed forward.

“Like what, Heather? Or should I say who? I'm absolutely _dying_ to know.”

Ice slowly creeped into Heather’s voice, a soft and dangerous cold that Veronica instantly recognised from the short time she was in their clique. It was her warning to back up and tread carefully.

“You do realise you’re making a scene out of maths work right? You’ve only been in the Heathers for a month and I can make _sure_ you’re a certified outcast in just a fraction of that time. You don’t know shit about me, so don’t expect me to suddenly sing ‘Kumbaya’ to you round a campfire and then tell you all of my sob stories. Shut it and give me the answers.”

Veronica gripped her phone tight in frustration, but the grip faded in a near instant as a realisation suddenly came to her. In fact, the fight in her fled almost completely as she contemplated her next thought.

_She’s right. I really **don’t** know anything about her, Heather or Heather._

It was honestly a scary revelation, that she’s been hanging out and making ‘buddy-buddy’ with a bunch of strangers. Veronica never thought of how little she actually knew about the Heathers. Nothing on their personal lives, families, hobbies, quirks or even basic facts about themselves. It was perhaps her fault she never bothered to try.

Maybe it was just early morning ( Late night? God, why did she even ask herself at this point) feels, or maybe she was just dangerously curious. Either way, she instantly regretted the next string of words that tumbled out of her mouth.

“You’re right, Heather. I really don’t know anything about you and I won’t pretend to. Maybe… maybe we should change that?”

_Shit. Why did I say that?_

“What? Suddenly decided I'm worth your time? I’m _flattered_ you think I’m so interesting, but you’re already on thin fucking ice, Sawyer. Don’t make this worse.”

The room felt as if it suddenly dropped a few degrees. The frostbite of Heather’s threat nipped off any of Veronica’s remaining confidence but even so, her cheeks flushed a deep warmth as an enormous wave of nervousness overtook her. She gulped. This was so unlike her.

”I mean- um… If you don’t want to do it, I’ll just drop it. Uh- shit, just forget I said anything. I’ll just send you the ma-”

She stopped her stumbling speech immediately when Heather’s deep chuckle resonated from within the phone. Warmth returned to the room at the sound and Veronica’s face continued to burn a bright red in the darkness, simultaneously grateful for Heather’s mercy and concerned at how quickly her mood seemed to change.

”You know, I’ll give you credit. You have balls to basically ask me to play a game of twenty questions with you at three in the morning. You’re fucking adorable when you’re scared, so I’ll humour you.”

She blinked. Oh. Thank god no one could see her now tomato-red face in the pitch black of her bedroom at the unexpected endearing term.

Veronica was thrown out of her thought chain by Heather’s increasingly exasperated voice. _Right. She’s still here._

“Hello? That also takes balls, you know. Ignoring me when I just agreed to your stupid request. Anyone home in there? Veronica?”

“Uh, yeah! Yeah, still here. Just- I didn’t expect you to say yes, that’s all. No offense, but you’re not exactly the friendly type, even to Heather and Heather. Guess you’re not the reptile everyone thinks you are.” Veronica cleared her throat before sitting back up on her sheets, fanning her cheeks gently to rid them of their heat.

Heather gave a mirthless laugh. “Astute observation. Me? A human? Having actual emotions? _Truly unheard of._ ”

”Wow, ‘astute’? You’re really getting fancy with the words there. Finally decided to listen in English?”

”Shut up, Sawyer.”

”Still a shit person though, don’t get me wrong.”

The girl in red snorted, thankfully amused by Veronica’s comment. “Believe me, I know. How else do you think I'm the top dog of the school? Like I always keep saying, if you want to fuck with the eagles, you have to learn to fly. And you, Sawyer, don’t even have your feathers yet.”

Veronica picked at her socks at Heather’s casual tone, intertwining her fingers in the woollen threads to try and rid herself of her lingering uneasiness. It was so strange to hear her like this, talking with an almost frighteningly friendly tone. Still, the arrogant air of her voice remained, kept in place almost as if it was a lock, guarding her darkest secrets from observant eyes.

Veronica moved her fingers from the strands on her socks to comb them through her dark brown hair. She swallowed the saliva collecting under her tongue in a pool. “Well, what makes you think I want to earn my feathers in the first place?”

“Oh please. If you didn’t, you would’ve left the first chance you got after sitting with us at lunch. You’re here now, so that means my allure was just too strong for you to resist.” The smug aura radiated in waves from the receiver on Veronica’s phone and she rolled her eyes at the predictable display.

“In your dreams, Chandler. Weren’t you just about to kick me out of the group a few minutes ago?”

“Ooh, we’re on a last name basis now, are we? Water under the bridge, Ronnie. We’re getting off track, ask me your questions before I decide to kick you out for real for wasting my time.”

It was funny how hard Heather tried to sound bored, but Veronica could hear the slight playfulness buried under the haughty tone. The return of her nickname also signified the end of needing to walk on eggshells. She relaxed at that, the bed under her crossed legs feeling a little more comforting than they had been all night (Heather’s call distracting her from her thoughts was a nice plus).

“Alright, fine. First, basic question but what’s your favourite colour?”

“...Really? You finally have me talking to you and these are the questions you want to ask me?”

Veronica chuckled at the almost disappointed tone Heather answered with, before firing back, “Not my fault you’ve been a mega-bitch ‘t’ll now. Just answer the question, Chandie.”

“Ew. First of all, never call me ‘Chandie’ again. Second of all, you’d be surprised but… my favourite colour is actually blue.”

Veronica’s back straightened at the answer and she leaned forward at nothing, almost like a moth drawn to a flame. “Blue, huh? I thought it would be red. You know… with the whole colour coding shtick you guys have got going on. Really weird how you do that by the way, I just realised.”

“Shut it Ronnie. But yes, blue is my favourite colour. I only chose red for its… meaning or something is all.” Heather sounded almost shy to admit that she knew anything about colour symbolism, but Veronica just grinned. Yep, Someone had _definitely_ been paying more attention in English, perhaps for a while now.

“I can hear you grinning from over here, and I’m telling you to stop right now.”

“Oh no, how did you ever guess. You got this whole colour coding idea from staring at traffic lights for too long or something?”

Veronica was surprised when a sudden bark of laughter resonated through her speakers, before quickly being stifled by Heather. The unexpected noise startled her, and a creeping warmth began to spread on her cheeks again at the unfiltered sound.

A cough was immediately heard from the other end. “Anyway, uh- continue.”

The neutral tone was back, laced with a tiny hint of detached coldness, as if she realised the casual flow of their conversation and was quick to distance herself from it again. Veronica was left feeling slightly empty at the return of Heather’s indifferent tone, but she ignored it in favour of continuing their phone call.

“Right. Uh- better question this time around…”

The conversation stuttered along from there, continuing early into the morning but never quite sitting right with Veronica the further along they got. Heather’s answers were clipped and short, sometimes sprinkling in a few interesting details and at other times unfortunate hissed warnings of irritation, but never reaching the first question’s comfortable vulnerability and new, easy rhythm. She was perhaps expecting this guarded, aloof attitude from Heather, but it felt dirty knowing just how animated and real the girl could get in a more secure environment.

The phone call plodded along, as feverish questioning turned into quiet rambling before dissolving into tired whispers. Before long, Veronica could feel her eyelids drooping and becoming heavy, blocking out the early weekend sun to finally catch some sleep. Heather’s voice played like a film reel next to her ear, slipping away in a gentle pattern as her hand loosened its exhausted hold on her phone. The girl’s deep tone was oddly soothing and before long, she found herself unconscious, quiet snores escaping her mouth in near perfect beats. Her last thought was one of curiosity, wondering why Heather herself had been up so late. It was quickly banished as her eyes drifted shut.

  


* * *

  


“...Veronica?” The line was quiet on the other end and Heather strained her ears, expecting a snarky reply to be returned any minute. Instead, dead silence met them and she scowled. She better not be blowing her off right now.

“Ronnie?” Heather tried again, careful to not sound too desperate. There was still no answer to be heard. As she went to end the call, dissatisfied with the ending of the conversation, she caught the quiet sound of deep breathing on the other end in time with her own breath.

Of course, the pillowcase was asleep. Veronica ran on two hours of sleep everyday with all the extra studying and scribbling in her diary she did, something that was not commonplace in Heather’s own life. She was left stranded and awake with only her own nightmares to keep her company, a can of disgusting worms she had no desire to open on a Sunday morning. Maybe that's why she decided to call Veronica in the first place (As much as she denied it, Veronica had brought up a good point. Why _did_ she call so early just to get maths answers?).

~~(Maybe she just wanted someone to talk to.)~~

She huffed at her own train of thought, dismissing it into another can that would not be opened now. Or ever. Turning her attention back to her phone, it was clear by Veronica’s snoring that she wasn’t waking up anytime soon. Heather swore a little under her breath at the realisation that she never received the maths answers. If she was being honest, however, she didn’t have it in herself to particularly care (Perhaps she never really cared about them, not even in the beginning). Her red-painted lips instead curled up in a soft smile at the thought of how easily Veronica was able to distract her. It was gone as soon as it came.

Nevertheless, it was almost cute in a way, how freely she fell asleep to Heather’s own voice (That was a can of worms she _also_ did not feel like opening today. She should perhaps be concerned about the amount of cans still left sealed). Heaven knows the girl desperately needed any rest that came her way.

“...Sleep well.” Heather’s voice came out in a soft murmur, the subdued emotion in her voice surprising even herself with its sincerity. Almost as quickly was she muttered it, the phone was off her ear, her finger quick to press the ‘end call’ button. A shuttered breath escaped her mouth and she brought a hand up to her face to rub away the sleep coating her eyes and the slight blush dusting her freckled cheeks.

Whatever.

It wasn’t like Veronica was awake to hear it anyway.

(A small part of her wished she was.)

**Author's Note:**

> So I hoped you liked my very first dip into fanfic with this one shot. It's pretty clunky and I honestly don't really like it that much. 10 points for anyone who figured out I gave up half-way and rushed the rest. Oops.
> 
> (Guys, I'm so tired.)
> 
> I really do hope you enjoyed reading it though! I might write more one shots but that's really up in the air right now. High school is a bitch and I hate it. Also, writing is not one of my strong suits and I honestly just did this for fun.
> 
> Please don't be afraid to point out any grammar or formatting mistakes. Comments and Kudos are, of course, very welcome!


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